FRIDAY, MAY 18, 2007
Dragonfly Dream's Buzz

Ok, so I've joined the Blog revolution! Why do I need a blog after all, I have a website? Well, perhaps I don't NEED a blog but what the heck, why not.... Today while setting this up I found that there is already someone out there (on Blogger) using my name. Sigh. So what else is new, this happens from time to time. I trade marked my name many moons ago but it doesn't protect me from folks outside of the USA or from folks doing something other than what I do. So there are Dragonfly Dream soap companies, quilt companies, and an artist in the UK calling herself Dragonfly Dream. What's a person to do, oh well, sigh and move on. Well I'm not having much fun doing this blog I gotta tell you. Every time I want to do something I have to reset my password. It's driving me crazy!!!

TUESDAY, MAY 22, 2007
Artistic Merit?

I was just thinking about "artistic merit". I am lucky that I grew up across the street from a rather edgy radical museum in New York City. The Whitney is renowned for displaying art that most folks would shake their heads at in confusion. I myself definitely did not understand much of what I saw there. I didn't like it, I didn't "get" it, I saw no reason for putting it in a museum. But then again I was a young adult trying to make sense of the world. But huge canvases painted white with nothing else on it just didn't do it for me. I was also lucky to have traveled to Venice, Italy and was exposed to the greats like Titian, Tintoretto, Bellini, Raphael, da Vinci, and the likes. So my visits to the Whitney Museum were interesting, I racked my brain trying to figure out what this art meant. So what is artistic merit anyway. Does it mean I would buy it? Hang it above my couch? Do I react to it or not, walk on by, or stop and view. What do you think????

WEDNESDAY, MAY 23, 2007
censorship

Over on a mail art list we have been talking about porno and censorship. Folks hosting mail art calls and then doing an exhibition are choosing to edit out items that are porno, or might offend. I personally don't think this is a bad thing. Other folks are crying about how that's not in the spirit of mail art because there is not supposed to be censorship, people are saying stuff like that's breaking the rules. Shoot, didn't mail art stem from a rule breaking crowd? It's also supposed to NOT have rules.....

SATURDAY, MAY 26, 2007
just do it,eh?

Well, I'm trying to gear up and be brave, go try and get my art in a gallery. The other day I was wandering around Santa Fe looking at some new gallery and although most of what I saw didn't interest me one bit I did think maybe, just maybe they would like my art. And yet, I still scared. Shoot, I consider myself an art snob and don't like most of what I see out there, I just know folks might not like my stuff either. It's a harsh world, the art world....

MONDAY, MAY 28, 2007
blog blues

Well I'm having serious troubles with this blog, can't even just log in, have to reset my password each time..... Even tried setting up a new account but that didn't work, don't know why either. So what is it about blogs that make us want to tell the world everything? Is anyone even reading my blog? Been putting together a traveling mail art box to share with some newbies to mail art. Went through an old box of stored mail art and had some fun memories and some hard ones. Two of my correspondents have passed away and it was sad to touch upon their art again. They are missed. And then of course there are the many folks that I have just plain lost touch with over the years...wonder what happened to Janet Hofacker the illustrated woman, and BabyNous, and E. F. Higgins?

TUESDAY , MAY 29, 2007
gave up

Gave up the spot on the web at Google Blogger. I just could not deal with having to go through 8 steps in order to post.... While other's did not have this trouble for some reason I did. So today I made this new page, so there, to heck with Blogger!

FRIDAY , JUNE 1, 2007
Server troubles

Had lots of troubles the other day. I worked on my site for hours adding the links for the blog and the site map and nothing took. The server was having troubles. I had no idea that anything was wrong, everything was working just like it always does. So the next day I worked again for another bunch of hours and all seemed well. But NO, same thing happened. But again I didn't know until the next day when finally while I was trying to upload I got a message that said some files were skipped during the process. Umm, this is odd. So I checked up on stuff and discovered the problems. So I waited a day and tried again. Oddly enough the changes I'd made days before were showing up this time! I have no idea what was happening. All too weird in my book.

MONDAY , JUNE 4, 2007
Swollen ankles

Got all the pages (as far as I know) up and running again. Whew, that was a task.

Life is good, except the other day I noticed that my ankles were swollen. I recalled that my old doctor had mentioned that this was a side effect that might happen. I've been on this high blood pressure medication for quite some time but a couple months ago my new doctor upped the dose as my pressure is still high. Sigh. So now the swollen ankles, yikes! Now what? Have a call into the doc this morning. So once again I'm trying to focus on what is good in my life. What do I have to be grateful for? TONS! First that I was adopted into a loving family, lived in a wonderful crazy city that gave me all kinds of insight into life and art, traveled much in my early years, found love, the list could go on and on.... I recall a website I found a couple of years ago that helps us remind ourselves of gratitude. Please take a moment and check it out!

It's not always easy to remember to be grateful in our lives. I recall a number of years back while I was on my cancer journey, someone had suggested doing a gratitude journal. Cancer sucks and my marriage was in turmoil. It was very hard to write 5 things in my journal that I was grateful for each day. At the time I just couldn't get passed the small things like my dog, and three cats. Ok, so that was four things, what could I add next? Oh, the tv show I was watching, Star Trek or Babylon 5, who knows. Life was a daily struggle. But now, over 7 years out I am able to look around and see gratitude all the time, all over the place. If inspiration fails I just have to look out the window and the blue sky, over at our pond, the sweet sound of the waterfalls, the flowers growing all around and of course I feel the love of a good man.......

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 21 , 2007

Flickr

I'm addicted to Flickr!!! What, you don't know what Flickr is, well check out my spot. Flickr is a great place to upload photos, explore other's photos, share your and discuss. It's really allot of fun! So if you have noticed I haven't been doing much updating on my site, sorry! A funny thing happened thank's to Flickr too. Someone checked out my photos and commented on one mentioning she was the one who sent me the wet sea sponge in a crayon box! That was one of the wildest things I have ever received as mail art, and the cool thing is that the sender's address had fallen off or maybe wasn't even there in the first place so now I know who it was! Yeah!!!

WEDNESDAY, JULY 11th , 2007

birthday

Been kinda quiet here as I have been so hooked on Flickr. Celebrated my 46th birthday over the weekend. We went up to Taos and stayed at a lovely spa. My honey gave me a lovely inlayed box and a leather checkbook cover with a dragonfly embossed on it. My taste for photography is back. I used to be into photographing big time in high school. Now I can hardly go a day or two without wanting to catch something. So if you haven't already check it out, take a peek at Flickr.

 

MONDAY, AUGUST 27th, 2007

Blood in cough

About a week ago I started coughing up a little blood. Now before you go panicking, it was only about 2 teaspoons worth. Then each day I would cough up a little more, like a teaspoon worth a day. Then it almost seemed like it was going away. But this morning another 2 teaspoons came up. So I called the doctor. Another x-ray has been ordered and then a new appointment with a new pulmonary specialist soon. Blood tests have also been ordered. Of course I am now panicking...... I don't want this is be serious! I want to live to a ripe old age with my love Edgard.

MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 10th, 2007

Made a new page to follow my recent health challenge. Things are a bit scary right now but the excited news is that Edgard asked me to marry him! We have talked about this on and off during the years but now time is of the essence and we have set the date! Check out our wedding page over at The Knot. So now in facing some major and very frightening things I have a shinning star of hope. Let me tell you that it is not easy when facing such scary stuff to have hope... I'm trying to be fatalistic. In looking around our house I seem to have a different view these days, so what if I never got that book shelf straightened up, or all the laundry put away, or those boxes unpacked. Who cares. What matter's most now is today and living life to the fullest. So pardon me if I don't quite get around to all those items on the "to do" list.

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 28th, 2007

Marriage plans continue even though I'm facing yet another battle with cancer. Now it's gone to my bones. See health for the story as it unfolds. Slowly but surely we are plugging away at getting the details in place for our wedding. I'm so excited. It is this that keeps me afloat and my spirit's up. I've got my ceremony outfit ordered and s few gifts for my attendants and we have the place picked out. Yeah. Onward.

TUESDAY, OCTOBER 16th, 2007

Bachlorette Party! My friend Lynn-Marie hosted a party for me. I booked us a limo bus and off we went to an all male review! It was the men from Playgirl and oh my were they built! This was a real hoot as non of us had ever done anything like this before. And another hoot was that we had 4 lesbians present! And when the question was asked who had slept with a woman before all but one of us raised her hand. The one who didn't actually sleep with a woman did kiss her! HA! So it was a wild ride as our driver had no idea how to get anywhere. We even had a bunch of maps and directions printed out for us and organized by my dear fiance Edgard. We arrived seriously late but they had held off starting because this was arranged my Lynn-Marie who even got the room to be non-smoking!!!! I was in for it as Lynn-Marie and another guest of mine arranged for some special lap dances which were done with me sitting on the stage! Oh my gosh was I embarrassed.... Well the show was mostly lap dances done for ladies who paid for special services with some dancing in between by the group. Some talented men there for sure, true athletes. Probably all gay too. But it was really fun and LOUD! All of us were hurting from the music and the yelling and laughing. It was a blast! Now I know you want to see pictures but this was a private deal and some of us didn't even want to have our picture taken on the bus. After all, we were a serious group of women including lawyers, gallery owners, music professionals, and movie producers. Okay, so you see my point..... Stay tuned though I might just get permission to post a few. Thank you Lynn-Marie!!!!

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 21ST , 2007

Logo Stolen and altered! My logo has been stolen and uploaded to a website. I'm so pissed. I don't know what to do. I wrote the company that has it but i can't seem to contact the thief. I informed my lawyer as well. Anyone know how to procede??

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 2nd, 2007

Logo stolen has been resolved. The folks at PhotoBucket removed it. Yeah!

SUNDAY, JANUARY 13TH, 2008

Back from our trip to Puerto Rico which was fun and hard. We were visiting Edgard's mom and brother. Edgard has not been back there for seven years and since then his mom suffered many mini strokes and is also losing her memory. Poor woman spends all of her time in a dark room sleeping. She can get up to eat and sometimes will also watch tv but basically she is just barely existing. It is like a death watch. Thankfully she did recognize Edgard and smiled. The first week we tried to visit everyday but the second week we were staying further away and did not visit as often. On our last visit we scared her and she didn't seem to know us at first. It's so hard. Certainly made me think about making sure my wishes are written down when I come close to the end with this damn cancer. Puerto Rico was so hot I could hardly feel all my hot flashes! My hair was always soaked while we were outside. We got to the beach twice which was lovely and we visited some ancient native Indian ceremonial grounds. But mostly we were cruising around the middle of the island. It was kinda like our second honeymoon and Edgard and I had a wonderful time with each other.

While we were there I read the breast cancer mets board and one woman posted about her remission of 6 years. It made me so hopeful. I went to her blog and read about her life now and some how it made me round the corner. I was so mad and fearful after the diagnosis and then I went into a sort of limbo and veery blah state. Now I am seeing the future as not imminent death but possible life.

And so now we are back to the grind and I'm making my lists of all the things we need to do, our wish lists and it's time to put away the Christmas decorations. I'm also doing a lot of purging of stuff. Cleaning out drawers and closets, getting rid of stuff that I no longer need or want. It almost feels as if for each thing I toss or give away, some cancer cells are dying.

Okay, so I'm weird, we all know that. but hey, you do what you can.

MONDAY, JANUARY 28th, 2008

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 8th, 2008 Been a bit slow to update these days. I've got so much I want to do, you should see my lists. I add something to the list and the try and work on an item but then get distracted and go do other things that are not on the list. Then I think of more things to put on the list.....sigh.... I've been getting some lovely feedback from friends on how happy and good I look. You would not even think I was fighting cancer again. Good news though, the recent cat/pet scan was great, no new mets and the possible tumor is shrinking!!!! I had a wonderful gift besowed on my thanks to my dear friend Letitia. She had her church give me a prayer shawl and I was blessed by the deacon and a bunch of women who gently laid hands on me. I cried, this was so special. Thanks Tish!!!

A Valentine for my friends!

Ever wonder what a hot flash feels like?

 

We also had a visit from John and Cathy Bennett and some friends.

Opps, it's Shelia, not Shirley! Sorry about that Shelia!!!!

MOND

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 23rd, 2008

 

This what my arm tends to look like after I have to get an injection or to draw blood. My viens have collapsed due to the chemo from years ago.

 

SATURDAY, MARCH 15th, 2008

I think I'm growing up. What a kinda sad thought. I've noticed over the years I've gone from brightly colored Converse high tops to Crocs. Yes, it's true, I'm an old foggie. The good news though is I'm feeling so much more alive and happy. I guess living with a cronic disease really messes with your mind. There is so much I want to do and what seems like so little time n ow. Gone are the days of being bored!

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